It's now 3 months and 6 days since you passed away and I miss you so much and I'm still crying all the time when I'm on my own. Everybody says I'm doing ok but I still can't accept that I'm never going to see you, hear your voice or cuddle you ever again. John - you enjoyed life so much and were so brave fighting your illness. John - you would be so proud of the boys - Martin kept his promise to you and gave up smoking 5 weeks ago and he's doing really well. Graham sold his BMW and is now driving your Honda. I bought myself the Vauxhall Corsa I was going to buy before you were taken ill. Ryan - our eldest grandson - achieved excellent results in his GSCE's 1 A star, 8 A's, 2 B's and 2 C's. He's set a precedent now for the others to follow! Jessica is starting work as a Saturday girl at the salon with Martin next Saturday.